3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize