She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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