They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Randomize
