Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
vagina is talking i cant
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
