never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
