His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
