So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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