No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
