capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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