Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
