Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
