drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Randomize
