i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
