I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
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