you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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