hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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