ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
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