"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I am naked and annoyed.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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