I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
