Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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