Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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