If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Say something about gay babies.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
