i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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