Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
