can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
