We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize
