Too much gin, very little bucket
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Randomize
