Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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