Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
In America we eat man semen.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
