Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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