I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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