i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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