hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
