Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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