Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
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