I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
