# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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