he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Randomize
