remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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