You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
