Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I love having hate sex.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
