wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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