like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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