Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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