She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i just had sex bonerless
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
