what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
