At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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