So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
