So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
