so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
